I know it's been a while since I wrote. I apologize for not writing to you more. Today, I feel like writing!
Christmas: Stress, Depression, Hard times, Loneliness... I had felt all these things at one point of time or another when it comes to this time of the year. I am happy this year. Truly happy. My Mom is coming out, Daddy might be here, my incredible husband will be here. We will celebrate by remembering one thing this seasons is supposed to be about: LOVE. People forget that.
I wanted to get many gifts for my girls this year, as they are amazing children who don't often ask for things or special treatment. My daughters are the face of Christmas. Last year my oldest asked me a sweet question. We were walking into Walmart and she asked about the "guy ringing the bell". I told her he was trying to raise money to help people who need it. She asked me if she could get money out of her piggy bank at home to put in his pot, I gave her a $5 to put in. We were watching Extreme Makeover Home Edition a few weeks back, there was a family that adopted special needs kids, as that's where their hearts led them. One of their kids was badly burned as a baby. She had no eye lids, no nose and was called a monster at school. My oldest, yet again, asked me why they called her such mean names. I told her the girls story and she told me, "But Mommy, she's beautiful. I would be her friend." Now tell me I'm not blessed.
I had not gone to church in many years, since I was in High School. I found many churches to be hypocritical and biased. If you didn't act a certain way, look a certain way or had a lot of money to give to the church, you were ignored, looked down on or just not welcome. I had been to several churches that dwell on the money given to them to make the church bigger and better. Don't they remember that Jesus preached wherever he wanted to? A church is just a building to gather. People could hold church, or fellowship in their homes, in the woods, in a gymnasium. It doesn't really matter WHERE you worship, it just matters that you do.
Now that said, my family and I have been attending church for one year now. The church we have been attending isn't rich with money or items, but rich in love and compassion. Last year they didn't even know us, yet gave gifts to my children knowing we were having a tough year. I could never thank them enough for the love they have shown my family over the past year. I have received enough hugs and assistance in other areas to make me smile one smile for every day of my life. My family is the youngest family in this church and my husband and I have tattoos and I have a piercing in my tongue, yet they don't look at us differently. We are loved. I feel that this Christmas is going to be amazing, not because I want it to, but because I have focused on much more this year than I have in previous years. I may not know you, but I love you. Pass it forward. Everyone Love Everyone. These little sayings hold more truth and heart in them than anything I've read in a book. Keeping your heart, mind and eyes open could guide you into a path you never thought you would see. I never thought I would find a place where church really was church, filled with joy, love, prayers, tears and mostly hugs. I never thought I would find a school for my children where the question, "Is there anything I can do for you?" was asked so often and hugs came as fast as grades. I feel loved, I feel joyful, I feel like I am wanted!
I want to wish you all an incredible Christmas. Remember one thing,
love one another."Beloved, let us love one another, for love is of God and everyone that loveth is born of God and knoweth God. He that loveth not, knoweth not God for God is Love." 1st John 4: 7-8.
I love you all. It's not about gifts, it's not about what you don't have. It's about love.
